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ASK, NOT TELL

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David

Tavistock Experience

Updated: Mar 24, 2022



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I attended a Tavistock Group Relations Conference last Dec.. It is a very unique experience to me. It is a weird one as well. There was a lot of ‘stuck-ness’, ambiguity and sometimes emotion in the conference. It is ‘empty’ (in a neutral sense) where each participant can make different senses out of the experience. I have been asking myself how I would summarise the conference. In reflecting with another alumni, here is what comes to my mind:


The conference is about surfacing the assumptions I have on how people interact in group by putting me in groups without specific tasks.


So, what assumptions have been surfaced so far? For me,

- I assume that groups should have a common purpose. Otherwise, it is not a group. I become irritated when people gather despite lack of common purpose or the pursuit to have one.

- I have natural tendency is to be of service to the others (or the common purpose) above. Even when I consciously tried to suppress it, I fell back into the default role from time to time.

- I assume that 'there is THE right answer to things'. This leads to my another strong assumption that 'I need to pursue to the right answers' Whilst intellectually I understand that sometimes there is NO right answer, I find myself acting or being on the assumption that there is one.


I have a sense that more ‘learning’ will come after the conference as I contrast this unusual group experience with daily one…


'If I could choose again, would I go to the conference despite its weirdness?' Yes, I would. In relation to my summary statement above, I think the conference gives me very unique opportunity to see myself in group.

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